The Bernoulli Principal
She was almost as old as me,
but she was tiny as could be and was
Pushing her umbrella thought a gale.
She struggled away with determination
but still it was a bad situation
It was plain that she was doomed to fail
I beckonedher into this nice warm bus stop, this
New York oasis where busses must stop, and I
Showed her how to hold an umbrella in winds so strong.
I said like an old wisened weatherman swami, don’t
Don’t face your umbrella into the tsunami,
Trying to force your way through is totally wrong
If you
Face your umbrella dead into the gale
Most of the time you are going to fail and get
Mercilessly ravaged but the wind and the rain.
Do not use your umbrella as a battering ram
As the forces of nature batter and slam, you must
Turn your umbrella into the wing of a plane.
In winds so strong an weather unruly you must
Use the principals of Bernoulli
Hold you umbrella up and make it a wing.
The wind speeding over your little umbrella
Will tend to lift up the little fella
Just hold it steady and you will not fight a thing.
As the gale rushes by in one frantic scoot
It pulls on the top of your bumbershoot
High pressure above, low pressure below.
Do what I’m saying and you will be thrilled as you
Feel the lifting start to build
Just like an airplane wing you’ll be happy to know.
Please listen to me I mean what I say
Hold your umbrella the Bernoulli way
Hold it up straight and merrily off you go.